pain · random stuff · stuff

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly Shoes

Saw the doctors this morning, receiving both good and bad news.

The good news: I have been given a much smaller brace/splint for my hand, making many activities much easier. I can hold a spoon and use the computer mouse. I may even be able to write! Next week I go back for more x-rays, to be sure there isn’t a small break that couldn’t be seen, but for now, I’m happy.

The bad news: I am going to need surgery on my ankle, which has, among other things, a chronic torn ligament, and some severe tendon damage. Before that I’ll be fitted for a custom set of orthotics – my insurance will not cover. “We give a reduced rate to Medicare clients, so it’ll only be $350” said the doc. ONLY $350. Add to that, with these orthotics I can only wear lace-up shoes. He says “Lifestyle changes.”

I am not a big fan of lace-up shoes. Give me a nice slip-on shoe, a zip-up boot, a pull-on ankle boot, or even a buckled sandle, but don’t make me have to tie my shoes every single time I put them on. Yes, I’m lazy. But I am also tired of being in pain, so I’ll adjust. There are a lot of comfortable and fashionable choices these days in laced shoes, I’m sure…so they tell me. I know that if I can get my hands on (my feet on?) a pair of Doc Martens, I’ll wear those and be happy. At least when the weather gets a bit cooler. In the heat, well, do Keds count? As long as I don’t have to wear Forrest Gump’s shoes, I’ll be happy.

random stuff · stuff

Brace Yourself.

Ugh.

Sunday night Brandon and I went out for a while. I dressed up, even wearing my one and only pair of heels for most of the night. We both looked pretty snazzy, if I do say so, myself. I managed to get through the night out in my heels without falling even once, which is a big deal for me. I fell later, wearing flats.

I fell on the way home, when we stopped at the gas station to pick up the ice cream I wanted (and the nicotine B was craving). Tripped on the curb, and SPLAT! I was sprawled on the sidewalk. Scraped both knees. Twisted my right wrist and hand. And smacked my head on the concrete , too. This “curbed” my apetite for ice cream – at least temporarily! By the time we got home my hand was swollen and I realized I could barely move my pinkie and ring fingers.

I spent the rest of the night with ice packs on both my face (in hopes I wouldn’t develop a huge black eye) and my hand. When the pain had not decreased by the next morning, we headed over to Urgent Care. I was pretty sure that at least part of my hand was broken – my pinkie was splayed way out from the rest of my hand, and to move either finger just made me want to cry!

After a little poking and prodding, a set of x-rays, and a series of questions (“No, I didn’t have a seizure.” “No, I hadn’t been drinking.” “No, nobody is hurting me.” ), it was determined that nothing was broken. My hand is severly sprained. They gave me a bulky brace “for comfort and healing” which I have to wear for three weeks. By the way, it is in NO WAY comfortable!

I can’t hold a pen, or a spoon. I cannot type (thank you, voice-to-text) or use the mouse correctly. Ugh.

stuff

Confusion and Magnetic Imaging

Today I visited The Oregon Clinic in Portland. I’ve been having a lot of pain in my left foot & ankle, especially after standing or walking for very long; I saw a podiatrist, who sent me for an MRI.

First, I must say that the actual process, the MRI itself, and the technicians who administered it, was fabulous, without any problems. Being strapped to a table is not my favorite thing in the world, especially when surrounded by a large, very noisy medical machine, but the lovely technicians tuned the big ol’ headphones into the 80’s station on Pandora, and I grooved to the tunes of my youth, and was able to relax. So much that I think I even fell asleep while they scanned my foot & ankle!

However, for several reasons I’m annoyed by the administrative folks at The Oregon Clinic. I was told my MRI appointment was for 1 o’clock, and that I needed to check in 30 minutes early. So, I arrived at noon, only to be told “You are really early! Your appoinment is at one; we told you to be here at 12:30 so you’d get that 30 minutes for check in.” Then I was handed a stack of papers which I was told were just vaivers – they turned out to be exact replicas of the online check-in I spent 30 minutes doing yesterday. (The whole point of those is so you do not have to do paperwork at the office, right?) Third, after handing back my insurance cards, the receptionist casually stated to me “They told you we don’t take your Washington insurance, right? Because we’re The Oregon Clinic, right, in Portland.” Which I was not told. Now I just have to keep my fingers crossed that Medicare will pay for the entire thing. Ugh.

I don’t know the results yet. I’m hoping it can easily be fixed, without surgery or having to wear ugly “good-for-Jonna” shoes all the time. As a wise man once said, it is better to look good than to feel good.

random stuff

Random Stuff from My Mind

It’s been an entire month since my last post. Shame on me….bad blogger! I really hadn’t realized it had been so long–every day I intended to write something. There is a REASON I am the Queen of Procrastination, ya know, not just the Princess! Jeez, you’d think someone who can talk as much as I can, about absolutely nothing, would be much better at keeping this blog up to date, wouldn’t you?

Of course, I always think I need to say something meaningful, or at least entertaining, and then I get a bad case of blogger’s block! I don’t know why I think a blog needs to be deep–I read enough of them to know that isn’t true! Some of them make Pauly Shore movies look meaningful! The approach I need to take is this: just write about whatever, and see what happens. Kind of the same thing I do when I talk…ramble

First an update on the last month of my life, in case anyone out there cares:

My bank account, which was hugely overdrawn due to the theft of my debit card, has been mostly fixed. It turned out that my laptop had a huge trojan virus, and a bunch of my info was being taken; I’m actually lucky that they only took such a minor amount of money! I am still trying to convince the bank to refund all of the overdraft fees, but somehow, I doubt that will happen.sigh

Healthwise, things are better. It’s been 31 days since my last seizure (YIPPEE!!), and that is fabulous! The thyroid meds seem to have finally kicked in, because I am FINALLY losing weight. (I hesitate to say that, for fear of jinxing it!) And inches, too. Back in April, I took measurements, and re-took them the other day: all of them were down at least 2 inches! It’s kinda freaking me out, because I’m not really doing anything differently. Still eating mostly green smoothies (except, of course, on those days when I have to have a big bowl of ice cream!), and coffee, and popcorn. Still sitting around on my ass, reading, surfing the net, and watching Netflix! A part of me wonders what is wrong, to cause this; yes, I am paranoid.

I gave up on growing my nails out, because I couldn’t stop from biting them. Frankly, I’d rather wear fakes than have my real ones gnawed down so far they bleed, which is where they end up! My hair still looks terrific, of course.

As for the online dating, well, I met someone. And for now, that is all I am saying about that!

meet-someone-fall-cry-for-help-ecard-someecards

 

I’ve spent a lot of time watching Netflix this last month. First I binged on True Blood, and now I’m finishing up Dexter. I didn’t make it through the last 2 seasons of Dexter when it was on the air, so these are new for me. Frankly, after Season 6, I think I would have quit. Maybe even Season 5. It’s not really living up to it’s potential; although I do enjoy getting to see Michael Clarke Duncan naked so often! And I am glad that Masuka got his own little storyline (and that we don’t have to see him naked!).

Still reading Fanfiction, and I just started reading a book called “Fic: How Fanfiction is Taking Over the World”  Anne Jamison, which is turning out to be very interesting. Can’t wait to review it for ya’ll!

A now, my little rant for the day:

I surprised myself today when I discovered an article stating that Barry Manilow got married back in April 2015, to his longtime producer and boyfriend! How did I miss this? Being the Fanilow that I am, how did this tidbit (not the fact that he’s gay– as if that’s a big shock-but the marriage) escape my notice? Honestly. I am a bit disappointed in Barry after reading several articles about this very private wedding (where Suzanne Somers was reportedly his ‘best man’ –and that bothers me, too!), simply because he still has not actually come out. No paperwork has been filed, and he has not made any statements. Apparently, Barry is too worried about his career, worried that his fans won’t understand if he admits he’s gay. To which I say “Oh, PUH-LEEZ! Give me a friggin’ break!” I’ve been a fan since I was in elementary school, and I realized in middle school that he was probably gay (I’m not sure I even really knew what that meant at the time.), but it certainly doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is that someone who sings about love so passionately doesn’t have the courage to put his love first. Especially now, when his career is rock solid. I ask you, Barry, “What would Tony do if this were about Lola?”

 

random stuff

These Days

These days of summer, the month of June, has been spectacularly obnoxious for me. Here’s why:

Near the beginning of the month, my debit card was stolen, and a number of charges were made online. The charges themselves were not very big, but my bank has added HUGE overdraft fees, leaving me nearly $900 overdrawn at the end of the month. I don’t even get nine hundred dollars in SSI/SSD each month!! We are working to fix this, but it seems as if the bank just doesn’t care. I hate it, and am not happy. And I’m broke, probably forever, now.

Add to the money problems the health stuff. The last year has been bad, seizure-wise, and we cannot seem to figure out why. OHSU, where I am a patient at the Epilepsy clinic, assigned me to a new doctor last Autumn, and I’ve seen her once. She keeps rescheduling my appointments. So I’m asking my GP, Dr Jeff, for a referral to the Providence Neurology & Epilepsy Clinic. I am done being shuttled around. That appointment, with Dr Jeff, is tomorrow. I get my thyroid level checked, too, after being on the med for over a year. Let’s hope things are looking up!

Some things are looking up, I can admit that. I’ve lost some weight in the last year, but not nearly what I need to lose. I am a short woman, with small bones, and weighing this much can’t be good for me. Now, I watched a TED Talk this week, and based on their info, even at this weight, I’m in the healthier group. See, I do 3 of the 4 things it takes to make you the healthy person: I eat plenty of fruits & veggies, I don’t smoke, and drink moderately. I don’t get enough exercise, but I’m working on it. Makes me feel better about myself, even if my clothes are a bigger size!

Seriously, 75% of what I eat these days is some sort of green smoothie. My NutriBullet gets more use than any other appliance I own, except my laptop! I am feeling better, and I know I am healthier. There are days when something happens to change that; last week I had a fairly bad seizure, and managed to injure myself in some strange places. How I got what looks like a rug burn/bruise underneath my boob, I have no idea, but it hurts like a bitch! Wearing a bra has been out of the question for the last week. (Oh, and the heat here, that’s only made things worse. I miss winter.) I’m finally not sore everywhere else, and feeling like a human being again. It’s amazing. Somedays I think my body hates me. Somedays I hate it.

These days, I only want to stop feeling as if I crawled out from under a rock. I looked like I should live under one for a while, but now I’m looking better, thank Merlin. I swear, I looked in the mirror last Saturday, and thought I’d been dead for a couple of days! Ick. Only my hair looked decent; I colored it the week before, and it’s very nifty. I’ll post some pics in the next couple of days–check Instagram!

These days, I am also having some interesting things going on; I’m back on the online dating scene, because I am apparently crazy (I will write about this later), and have no idea what I’m doing. I am trying to grow my nails out again, and not biting them is torture! Trying to answer Oprah’s “20 Questions Every Woman Should Answer.” I have no good answers. I never do.

 

Beauty · Hair

Letting My Hair Down

My hair is driving me crazy. Last autumn, in a fit of stupidity that I regret every day, I chopped off my longish hair (it was just barely below my shoulders) to chin-length.

Before

And a month or so after that, I cut it even shorter.

After, part 1
After, part 1

After, Part 2
After, Part 2

 

I must have been out of my mind. I hate having short hair. I think I look like a fat lesbian (not really the look I was going for, not that there’s anything wrong with fat lesbians.).  Still, I’ve had my hair many lengths over the years, from all the way down my back to ear-length. My first big hair-cut was at age 12, when I went to the mall one day with some girlfriends, and on the spur-of-the-moment, cut it to my shoulders. Photos of me from junior high show a hair tragedy (and that;s saying something, since it was the ’80’s!), and in high school, it was only marginally better.

20140604_173456
Rhonda & Shelley both rocked the 80’s big hair (this was a small-hair day), but mine just looked…nice.

In college, I let it grow out, and was happy with it.

I loved my hair this length. And the curls were fab!
I loved my hair this length. And the curls were fab!

I kept letting it grow. I had long hair for my wedding, even though the style I chose was awful!

CatchingThe Bouquet2
Long hair, but NO style!

Longer for the next few years, as well.

shelved

kitty

sly

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why I cut it this short, I’m still trying to figure out. I remember complaining about not being able to do anything with it, being tired of endless ponytails, but I know it was better than it is now. So one of my summer projects is to grow my hair. (Another is toGrow-you-hair clean my room, but I think my hair will be long again before that happens!) I’ve researched (meaning: looked at stuff on Pinterest) ways to grow hair fast, and I’m trying some out. Scalp massage, Biotin, and a type of bergamot oil are all on the list. Wish me luck. Hair shouldn’t be a tragedy! hairtragedy